Risk and trust and hope and smallness [Katina]

Coming back to teaching after so long felt like a risk. My uncertainty on day one felt overpowering. I’ve felt echoes of that uncertainty every Tuesday as our class time approaches. I remember wondering during the first session what kinds of thoughts, ideas, feelings, connections would emerge through the semester. If we would collectively do work that felt valuable, useful, interesting, joyful.

Now, as we wrap up, I feel the delight of having taken a worthwhile risk. I haven’t commented on your posts this week but I am sitting with each of them, savoring them. I have especially appreciated working with Matt—our mutual co-thinking process and his support and assurance—as I have learned, slowly, a little bit, to trust myself as a teacher.

Photo of a graffiti-covered stone with the words "I CELEBRATE MYSELF" etched into it

I snapped this at Riis Beach with my kids this past weekend; it feels like a fitting image to hold onto as we close this semester. The affirming message etched in stone, the swirls of graffiti layered on top—it makes me think of the complex layers of thought and possibility and hope that this class collectively generated.

I think the thing that has most changed my thinking is to celebrate smallness, and not to discount the seemingly little actions we take. I’m reading Emergent Strategy now and am immensely grateful for that recommendation; adrienne maree brown puts into words so many things I haven’t known how to articulate, and things I sometimes haven’t known how to value.

Thank you, each of you, for being a part of this ephemeral community we call a class.